For the low low price of $179.95 you can spend three days and two nights experiancing the craze that is sweeping the nation.

TIME MAGAZINE© calls Kyle Bermer's Reality Tour© "the newest craze in American vacations. Taking a cruise was for the 90's, taking drugs is for the now."

For the extent of your stay you will be stationed in the luxurious sweep of Kyle's Room, fully heated and with a great driveway view.

When you arrive at Club Kyle© you will be given a large ration of drugs. These will be yours to freely consume as you desire throughout your stay.

You will take part in all activities that Kyle takes part in: From having sex with girls he brings home and arguing with family, to ingesting so much drugs and alcohol that you no longer know who you are.

The staff at Kyle Bermer's Reality Tour© guarantee that you will have the most spectacular time of your life. They are dedicated to serving your each and every need. Breakfast in bed, body rubs, hood washes... they'll do it all.

Kyle Bermer's Reality Tour© comes with a 100% money back guarantee. Your satisfaction is our responsibility and we take it very seriously.

To finish your weekend off you will be sent against your will to Portage (a militant rehab clinic) to get rid of any nasty habits you picked up during your stay.

For more information or scheduling, please contact Kyle Bermer via e-mail. Allow 3-5 business days for a reply.